Hell and High
Water
Burnley 0 Luton 2, 7 March 2000
Jo Tomlinson
It was raining cats and dogs as we approached
the Turf. Absolutely pouring down. I put up my BFC umbrella, duly received from Santa
Claus this Christmas, and made my way to my seat in the Bob Lord. The pitch was well and
truly sodden and one wondered whether perhaps this was a game that should've been called
off. We certainly didn't want to pick up any injuries tonight at this crucial stage in the
season.
The puddles lay heavily on the pitch as the rain
poured down, glinting in the spotlights. Turf Moor wasn't as full as Saturday, obviously,
but an impressive number had made the journey in the inclement weather, although not many
Hatters fans had.
Burnley lined up as follows:
Crichton, Branch,
Little, Thomas, Davis, Cox, Mullin, Johnrose, Cook, Cooke and Wright.
But where the chuff was Payton? No Payton in the
starting line up? I could hardly believe it. Let's face it, this was not a winning side on
Saturday against Preston. Could we really justify leaving our leading goal scorer on the
bench?
Luton lined up in their white shirts and black
shorts, a pretty much anonymous side whose names meant little to me. Really we should be
beating this lot comfortably and confidently. Yes, tonight was the night to lay the ghost
of Saturday's thrashing by PNE and reassert our position in the division again.
The ball sloshed about the field in the opening
minutes of the game. Most of the action was in their goal area, by a Burnley side who
looked vaguely superior early on to Luton town. The healthy Tuesday night crowd began a
few chants of 'Stan Ternent's Claret and Blue Army' and we were sure that tonight was our
night.
Superb play from Little to Wright and then to
Cooke saw the ball go just wide of the net, resulting in a corner. This was received by
Davis, who sent a powerful header goal bound, but somehow it just missed, and that, to be
honest, was to be the story of the night. Bertie Bee meanwhile paraded jauntily in front
of the Longside stand, rousing chorus's of 'Stan Ternent's Claret and Blue Army' from the
Longside crowd. This was a mascot with attitude and he was doing his job, like it or not.
It was not long before the players had really
dirty bottoms and legs, such was the state of the pitch. They were skidding about all over
the place, and the rain continued to pour down.
Suddenly, one of Luton's defender's made a major
error, a backpass that went badly wrong. Wrighty found himself with the ball, one on one
with the keeper. This was it, the crowd were on their feet, go on, go on, go ON we
urged... but instead of taking the keeper on with confidence and taking it right up into
goal, he made a weak shot, which of course was caught expertly by the Luton keeper,
totally undaunted by Mr Wright's shot. Ho Hum...
It was not to be Ian Wright Wright Wright's
night as Little broke down the wing and sent a superb pass to him, which he shot goal
bound, but which was again blocked. We had all the pressure; both Wright and Cooke were up
there and had numerous chances. The pitch was in a mess, make no mistake, and any sense of
real football was almost impossible. Cook had the right idea tonight, he just kept sending
long balls into the box and the belief was that sooner or later one had to go in. Thus at
precisely 8.10pm when Luton scored completely against the flow of play, a feeling of mass
disappointment resonated amongst three sides of Turf Moor. The Luton fans meanwhile awoke
from their drenched slumber and celebrated in delight. They could hardly believe their
luck, winning away from home in a game in which they certainly hadn't had the lion's share
of play.
Another shot from Wright narrowly missed goal
and I began to get that familiar feeling of 'it's not going in the net tonight come hell
or high water.' And it WAS high water, as the rain poured on... and on...
Half Time and I sat in my seat, not daring to
brave the elements to get a coffee. After Roger Eli and Ron Futcher stepped onto the
hallowed Turf to draw the Striker Lottery, suddenly from nowhere Bertie Bee made a
surprise entrance dressed as ELVIS! Strutting around clad in his Bee head and a purple
silk outfit, one suddenly had horror nightmares of the Swanky Pants Dog troupe again, but
this was out very own Bertie Bee, clearly fancying himself not just as the Army Dreamer
from the game on Saturday but now as Elvis. He strut his funky stuff- o -o, did a few
impressive dives and moves to a tune by the King of Rock and Roll and I rubbed my eyes to
see if I was dreaming...
'Bertie, don't over play your part' I thought to
myself, but was nevertheless somewhat amused. However, I have to confess that although I
don't wish to be a killjoy, it was too like the Swanky Pants performing dog troupe for my
liking!
Second Half
As the players ran onto the pitch for the second
half, I fully expected to see Payton on for Branch. Why not play three strikers? We had
nothing to lose and everything to gain. It was one of those skill free games where the
pitch and the conditions dictated the play, and so why not have them there ready to head
in any ball that came their way? Stan, however, didn't have that idea, and I was truly
amazed to see the hapless Mellon and Smith run out in place of Branch and Mullin.
'Andy, Andy Payton' screamed the amazed
collective of Clarets around three sides of the ground. Stan stood there defiantly, and
one had the feeling that the more we shouted for him, the less he was likely to make an
appearance on the pitch. Maybe it's me but Stan had that defiant look which said 'I'M the
manager, OK?'
The rain had abated slightly, but the puddles
remained. Smithy got a few decent crosses in, but at 9pm it was suddenly Burnley 0 Luton
2, on the rebound from a corner. Bloody Hell.
'ANDY, ANDY PAYTON' shouted the furious Burnley
collective, an octave higher and with more force
This time Stan obviously thought better of it
and decided that our star striker was perhaps better on the pitch than on the bench after
all. Payton made an impact from the start; he was always there at goal, although sadly
none of his chances came to anything. He absolutely should have been on from the start
however, it was ridiculous that he wasn't and I think that the result would've been
slightly different had he have been on the end of the crosses early on.
Little superbly took the ball up the pitch
towards goal and had a shot himself, the ball went skimming over, just... arrgghh... It
was not our night.
Payton did manage to get the ball in the net but
the linesman's flag was up for offside. Davis also had a mega shot from 25 yards out. We
all leapt up off our seats. This was it, this was it... yes, yes... NO! This time the
crossbar got in our way. I couldn't believe this, what was going on here? Had someone
broken a mirror in the dressing room or wot?
The rain began to pour once more and we all
murmured a silent plea for the game to be called off, but really there was no chance of
that happening.
More chances came to nothing, until suddenly
they had a free kick, which they took well before the ref or anyone was ready, and for one
heart stopping moment it looked as if we were going to go 3-0 down again. Luckily and
deservedly the player missed, and rightly so, as the ref should have clearly blown his
whistle but didn't. Wrighty had a further powerful shot that hit the boards of the Jimmy
Mac stand heavily: another very near miss.
Then something happened which I'm not clear
about, but basically the referee decided to have a five minute conference with the
linesman. It interrupted the flow of play and ultimately resulted in a yellow card for
someone. The Burnley fans were getting frustrated by now. Come ON we yelled, come on.
The old man in front of me said that no way were
we going up now, and his infectious pessimism took hold of me for the remainder of the
game, I have to confess.
Lots of players were skidding about the mud bath
pitch by now. Great for pigs and mud wrestlers, not so great for footballers. Someone is
going to have to get the Persil Biological out tonight that's for sure.
Johnrose got Man of the Match in front of a
crowd of 12, 080. 'Thanks for bringing the 80!' yelled someone to the Luton fans. We all
laughed in the Bob Lord, although in truth there wasn't much to laugh about. It had been a
wet, muddy, frustrating night and we had lost three points at home for the second time in
three days. Personally I think Stan's team selection was to blame. Granted, we DID have
lots of chances and we were unlucky on a few occasions, but something isn't hanging right
somehow.
I can't quite put my finger on what it is, but
it ain't happening for us at the moment. I had really thought we would win tonight, I had
predicted a 4-0 drubbing of Luton, but instead we lost by two goals at home to a very
mediocre side. Hmmm...
Can I say anything positive about it? Nope, not
much, but I'll try (cos I get accused of being negative in my match reports!). Cookie
played really well, particularly in the first half; Wrighty was unlucky on a couple of
occasions (it just isn't going to go in for him is it?); Crichton did some dreadful
kicking tonight; Little made some impressive runs; Davis has improved again; it was good
to see Thomas back; and the rest were just ok.
But as I said, something isn't just right.
Not a lot else to say, except a frustrating blow
to our promotion hopes against a side who didn't look particularly good. However, onwards
and upwards. Roll on Saturday against Wrexham.
Team: Crichton,
Branch (Smith 46), Little, Thomas, Davis, Cox, Mullin (Mellon 46), Johnrose, Cook (Payton
56), Cooke and Wright. Subs not used: Jepson and West.
The away game
