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In Pursuit of Brownie Points
(musings of the self-appointed secretary of the 1987 royal back bench committee)

Under-soil Heating

Well call me Mister Stupid if you will, but what is the point of under-soil heating if at the first real test it doesn’t work? Oops sorry, it does work, but is ineffective. The day of the Bradford game was not exactly warm, but Burnley is not Siberia. It may seem so to some local Claret residents, but speaking as someone who has actually been to that black hole part of the world, believe me that New Year’s day was not ‘real’ proper cold. What was it Holt once said, at the 1999 AGM I think: "Turf Moor would never again see a game called off due to the weather." As one of the many Clarets from all over the country who made special arrangements (at some expense) to be at this particular game, I had never even imagined that the game would be off. It should also be said that BFC’s administrative efforts on this particularly day were crap. I’m so cheesed off about this, I’ve moved on to the cigars and brandy!

The Honours Board

Well would you believe it Stan finally gets his just desserts and gets the Manager of the Month for November 2001. Wins at home against Grimsby, Sheffield United and Watford, a draw at home to Pompey and the very special win at Coventry. Top man for the second time as a Claret, the first time in April 2000, when we won six out of seven.

A lesser known top performance by the club was in the Prince’s Trust Football Excellence Awards, where we were recognised as one of the seven top achievers in the football world. The award is part of the Prince’s Trust Volunteers Programme, enabling 16-25 year olds to work together to develop confidence, motivation and skills through teamwork in the local community. We didn’t win the top award, but could you conceive of the club being even mentioned only a few years ago? Kevin Ball in particular got a special mention for his efforts. Top man.

Seem to get quite a few mentions in the Nationwide Team of the Week, but haven’t yet agreed with many of them. On what basis are these decisions made?

Where are they now?

Players seem to continue to leave this club under Stan’s reign, and all without exception play on, if at all, at a lower standard. The team continues to change, and if you contrast the sixteen that played against Manchester City when we were demolished 6-0 at home, with that at the most recent Maine Road beating, Glen Little is the only name that stands out. Leigh RMI (Farrell, Scott et al) is the main repository for some of our old lesser lights, as is Hartlepool (Smith and Henderson) and of course Rotherham. Good luck to them all, except of course if they meet the Clarets somewhere.

The Media

Still not great coverage for the lads in the press, but it is improving, which it needed to if they are to cover the top Nationwide team. A totally different emphasis in the main news of course when KK’s Manchester City recently regained their ‘rightful’ place at the top of Division One. A recent Sunday Times effort was reasonable, and provided something I hadn’t realised before about BFC. Apparently in the days when we were the smallest spot by population to sustain a top division side, we were known as the ‘Village Team’. Christened by Shankly, I believe. Still also, of course, the fourth best supported club in the country by head of population, behind the likes of Ipswich.

These are two of my favourite teams

In the style of Julie Andrews, step forward Millwall and Cardiff. I have just seen and heard the disgraceful scenes both during and after the Cardiff cup game against Leeds, and laughed at these so called knowledgeable commentators saying, "We thought the game had rid itself of this unruly element." Where have these people been? Not to Cardiff and Millwall recently, that’s for sure. Anyone who went to the game at Ninian Park the last time that the Clarets played at that hell hole know what I mean, and don’t bother to ask the boys in blue for help, as they are just as bad there. Almost feel sorry for the Leeds fans.

Anyone who read Grant Waters’ excellent note to Bazza Kilby following the recent Millwall away game, or who were there in person, will be well up to speed on the issues. If this continues on this downward spiral, a fatality is inevitable, when presumably the soccer authorities will stop burying their heads in the sand. Why not action pre-fatality? What did Burnley FC do after the latest problems?

I was actually privileged to be at the first supporters' club meeting with the Board, when I personally raised the Millwall problems following a recent game then. I even raised the issue with the Millwall Chairman at the time. Nothing. One for the next supporters' meeting methinks.

Statistics

Who was it once said that statistics make the past even more uncertain than the future? Probably me. Anyway, here are one or two which might make the little grey cells waken up a bit. Here we are in 2002 with 50 points from 26 games. Statistically just safe from relegation. We have now played all of the other nine teams in the top ten in the division away from home. Continuing in the current form would give us 88 points for the season. In over half of the past 13 seasons, 85 points has been good enough for 2nd place. The highest total achieved by the 6th team in the 13 seasons since the division was expanded to 24 clubs is 76, which was only achieved on 4 occasions. Hmm.

Hego
January 2002

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