Come on, what's the one thing everyone knows about Brentford? That the ground has a pub at each of its four corners, right? Yet in football, nothing is sacred, and this is apparently no longer the case. One has gone, and now a mere three corners are taken up by licensed premises. Which is still, of course, more than most. But one still feels something has been lost. Never mind, what's the second thing everyone knows about Brentford anyway? Hang on, there isn't one, is there? This is an ever underachieving side based in a corner of anonymous London.
Not that I mock anonymous London. I live in anonymous London. Millions do. But the average northerner coming down expecting the bright lights of the big city is liable to head home disappointed. Although the West End's mere miles away, Brentford is a town like any other. It just happens to be attached to West London. It's impossible to talk about Brentford without bringing in the M4. The elegant curve of the elevated highway utterly dominates the town. Night and day traffic roars above and through Brentford, desperate to escape from or into the city. If you've ever thundered along this stretch, you've been past both Fuller's Griffin Brewery and Griffin Park - the headlights are visible hard by the stretch to the south. This makes for an unwelcoming approach to the ground. Shiny office blocks sit next to oily underpasses. Yet away from this, the High Street itself is typical West London pleasant, and there is even an old Brentford with a nice park. Remember, you're not far from Kew, just south a hop over the river, and further down Richmond Park, and the long slow slide into the torpid niceness of South West London.
London ingenues should waste no time looking for Brentford on a tube map. It doesn't have one. Proper trains go to Brentford from Waterloo, some stopping at Vauxhall, and Brentford station is very close to the ground. If you fancy a pint first, however, you may do better to get off at the stop before, Kew Bridge, or even Gunnersbury tube, from where some careful negotiation of big roads will get you onto Brentford High Street. If you're coming from Central London the standard four zone One Day Travelcard will suffice to get you around.
Fuller's is the local brewer, and you'll consequently find more Fuller's pubs in the area than anything else. Nothing wrong with that, although their flagship London Pride is not amongst my favourites. The ESB is too strong, so given the choice, I prefer the easy-going Chiswick Bitter. I think the beer of theirs I like the best is the light, refreshing Summer Ale, but as the name suggests, you don't get this in the football season. Look out also for the beers of the other main London brewery, Young's. The standard beers on offer are Bitter, AKA ordinary, an excellent pint for all day drinking, and Special, a serious beer but on the strong side if you're out for the duration. In winter there's also - another clue in the name here - the dark, sweet Winter Warmer.
Having specified what you are likely to be drinking, let us start with a pub which sells an entirely different selection of beers. The Magpie and Crown on Brentford High Street has no set range, just obscure guest beers from independents and real cider too. On our last visit it was very busy, the beer came in oversized glasses, and the people were friendly. It's not too far from the ground.
Before that along the High Street, the Beehive is a pleasant Fuller's pub. Admittedly I can remember little about it, as my last visit there was the morning after a heavy night in the company of David Eyres and Nigel Gleghorn at a London supporters' do, but notwithstanding a hangover of epic proportions, I enjoyed the pint here.
Of the four pubs at the ground, I do not know which has disappeared. The Royal Oak, selling Fuller's and Courage, was always supposed to be the best. I went in one of them once, and assume it wasn't this one, because it was crap. Plastic glasses, rubbish beer, but what do you expect if you drink next to football grounds?
There's a pub by the station I've never frequented, and another nearby pub is the Lord Nelson. Usual Fuller's was on offer in a big pub with an Australian emphasis and, strangely for one close to a football ground, it was very pro-rugby.
Also in this neck of the woods is the Globe on Windmill Street, another Fuller's pub that rings a distant bell.
This isn't the usual great selection, but obviously it's been a while. There are many other Fuller's pubs around here, and beyond this, there are lots of good drinking areas close by. Hammersmith and Richmond both offer fine evening stops, or there are always the Fuller's pubs of Chiswick to the east, or Ealing to the north or Kew and eventually Kingston to the South. Plenty of good drinking to be had out there.
