Crewe
There are better places to go for a beer.
In some ways, Crewe is an easy day out. You've got the railway station, which is handy for everywhere, and the ground actually and unmissably slap bang next to the station, to the point where I refuse to give directions. (Of course, it so happens that our 2003/04 season visit will be on the one day in the fixture list where there is no rail service. Ho hum.) Anyway, you couldn't not find the ground, whatever they may call it these days, if you were trying. Hmm, but notice anything missing from this equation? Yes, my friends, good pubs are in extremely short supply. You do not come here for the quality of the drinking.
As it happens, I won't be there on Boxing Day 2003 and a frankly tedious work commitment kept me away in February 2002, so I haven't tasted the slim delights of Crewe since the outrageous Alan Kaye-inspired game of four penalties in February 2001. So apologies for any inaccuracies and omissions are due.
There did used to be one fine pub near the ground. It was something of a well-kept secret. In fact, it was officially closed on matchdays, but we had a contact who was prepared to sneak us in by the back door. To be honest, if it was still good, I doubt that I'd be mentioning it here. It is the Albion, on Pedley Street, of which I speak. It had guest beers from small breweries complementing the ever available and gorgeous Tetley dark mild, and appropriate railway stuff all over the walls. Then, as happens, the pub changed hands. Oh dear. On my last visit, again waiting for a connection (it's characteristic of the town that I've visited more while changing trains than when my destination is the town itself), much of the railway stuff had disappeared, the bar was cluttered with gaudy electric dispensers of bland drinks and the mild was vinegar.
It's a loss, because, although there are other pubs around, they don't look promising and you'll struggle to get in them. You emerge from the station onto Nantwich Road, and going left, past the ground, you see various dubious-looking pubs and takeaways. The only pub around here I've been in is mediocre, and therefore good for these parts. Although it's been a few years now, the Brunswick was a big and nondescript pub, formerly branded as a 'beer engine', and slightly grubby inside. It did, however, sell real beer on that last visit, with Boddingtons probably being the pick of an uninspiring Whitbread range.
Some away fans might get in, but, as ever, don't count on it. Pubs on this stretch tend to have door policies. Remember always that Crewe is not what we would call a football town, so the pubs aren't geared up for a thirsty opposition influx. After the match, you will struggle to get a pint anywhere. With half an hour to spare following our match in 2001, I couldn't get into any of the pubs. There were people in them and the doors were locked. Clearly, you have to look for the back doors, as I know people who did find a drink did. It's a bit of a lottery, but perhaps it's best to follow some Crewe fans. Otherwise, it's the buffet on Crewe station and a bottle of Beck's. It was pretty busy in there.
Continuing on the Nantwich Road tack, there's a Crewe pub guide on the Crewe rivals.net website, which lists some pubs around this stretch.
You may well want to get something to eat, and there are food places around these parts. Hopefully the chippy close to the station will have improved since my last visit. Then, at 7.30 on a Saturday night, they were selling no food whatsoever. No chips, no fish, no pies. On Saturday night. This was the same night as the Albion vinegar pint. Yes, Crewe really gave a good account of itself that evening.
If you have some time to spare before the match, better pickings are to be had in and around the town centre (station and ground being united in the fact that they're not in it).
The Monkey, on West Street, was an excellent Eccleshall's pub. I gave this a big write-up in an earlier edition of this guide, having been thoroughly impressed on my visit. I was then informed that the Monkey had closed. Bloody typical! Our correspondent also went on to mention that Wetherspoon's were to open a pub in the town centre (that would be the Gaffers Row, on Victoria Street). He didn't seem too excited about that, though, stating that "nothing will ever replace The Monkey".
On the other side of the centre, on Earle Street, the King's Arms was a decent, bog-standard, Boddingtons-selling pub.
That's probably not worth the trip itself, but also on Earle Street, sat above the railway, is a truly fine pub, the Borough Arms. At last, here was a place worth coming to Crewe for. We had several splendid pints in here before the match in 2001. It sells a huge range of beers, always changing, from small breweries, along with lots of Belgian stuff, including draught Belgian beers (if you're into that sort of thing). My only gripes last time were that the decor was naff and it would have been good if they'd sold food, but they'd only recently taken over and were making changes, and when the beer's that good, who's complaining? So friendly was this place that they even laid on a lift to Gresty Road, which was service beyond the call of duty. And, to prove that everything connects, the landlord of this drinkers' paradise used to run the Albion, back when it was good.
The only other Crewe pub I know is the Cheshire Cheese, on Crewe Road, a big place miles out of town. That 'Crewe Road' is a bit of a giveaway. A cab was required and it wasn't worth the effort. Beer was standard, the pub thought too much of itself, and the welcome was unfriendly.
For those coming from the North, the only acceptable drinking halt is Macclesfield, where there are only about half a dozen great pubs within a few minutes of the railway station - if you're travelling on a day when the trains happen to be running.
Firmo
Last visited: February 2001
Last updated: December 2003
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